Dating for Funnies

First dates can be funny for me.

No joke.

When the date is “funny” it means at one point I was doing my uncomfortable laugh, and/or at one point confused by who my date was.

Generally, as a human.

I grab my keys posthaste as we walk to my car, and give the polite pat on the back hug as I say thank you. I immediately want to call a friend so that I can transmute the oddness of my experience with comedy.  Over the years I have had a handful of first dates that when shared with friends inspired the type of laughter that always made me feel like a stand up comedian. And still does.

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Thanks, I try.

What is my point? Well, my point is this…laughter really is the best medicine in the case of first dates. Before to calm nerves, during to connect, and after to decompress. Whether through continued laughter from the date (phew! it went well.), or a fresh new set of laughs to share with a good friend by way of simple story telling.

Single friend over 30, it can easily feel daunting at times. I understand. I empathize. I live it. But I also try not to see it this way. Why think things are daunting when this can end up becoming a belief that things are hopeless? My Beautiful, Hopeful, and Uniquely Spirited single person-feeling hopeless can turn into harsher types of negative thinking. If you are to attract positive you need to be positive and happy about dating. And you (and I) don’t need anyone or anything in our lives to create these feelings.

That is our job.

So I say why not be a little humorous about it? Bad date? Oh well. It was one date and you knew at one point during it this person was not someone you wanted to invest anymore time with. So you make the best of it, you take your leftover food home, maybe crack open a beer, curl up on the couch, and call a friend. As you share and reflect on the date, placing yourself outside of it you now realize the funny parts. The odd or confusing parts. The parts that made you have a better understanding of not only the type of person you are looking for, but the type of person you are at the core. Nothing about the date can change that, and that is the beauty in it all. You just had this one date that didn’t make you really excited, happy, or yes, laugh.

But one day you will lock eyes with someone and you will feel it as the conversation flows. Where the laughs happen during the date, after the date, via text, the phone calls, and everywhere else; for so much longer Thereafter.

Maggie xo

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Guilty Gems

“You were not born to be like someone else. You were born to be like you.” ~Rebecca Campbell

So, I’m not really sure where I will go with this post. You might find yourself relating, amused, or some great surprise feeling you didn’t even expect to have from reading this. I don’t know, and with that I thank you for bearing with me!

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       Soooo…??

A mom that I work for has a TON of trashy magazines in her house. It is a special treat for me when I go over there because I never buy them, but boy do I find them entertaining if they’re lying around.

If you are judging me for this guilty pleasure feel free to stay seated waaaay up there while you read.

We all have our hidden gems though, right?

Anyway, I turn the TV on, make a neat stack of the magazines in my lap, four at a time, and then put them in chronological order. Because I am not afraid to admit the little ceremonial oddities that comfort my wonderfully weird mind.

I fly through the articles that look boring or with the pictures of fashionable items I can neither afford or pull off. I also tend to pause mid-mag and think…

Who am I to judge who wore it best? If they like it does it matter? Who cares? Why am I reading this crap? :Sigh: but I’m kinda really enjoying this.       This is not the time to go deep Maggie. It’s just not. Every moment of my life does not need to be analyzed in this way. I shake my head, keep reading, muttering to myself about who I decided wore it best and how cool it is that Selena Gomez wears jeans just like me.20151003_005032

I think it’s totally okay to indulge in this manner. Just do it. Keep the sessions short and sweet. Savor the mindless activities that relieve you of any pressure to do or be anything than just there.

And don’t compare yourself to famous people. Or anyone for that matter. If you wonder why-go back to the beginning.

Maggie xo

Heart on My Sleeve…where it will Stay

I like Taylor Swift. She makes me happy and also sits with me on some sadness I have experienced in past relationships. She reminds of my niece and I have fun singing to her in the car. Okay I love her.

I like the movie Enchanted. The song at the end that Carrie Underwood sings about “ever ever afterrrr?” Love. Yea I love this movie.

I sometimes YouTube Jim and Pam’s wedding just for a smile.

I check in with an ex a few times a year just to remind myself that some connections can still warm my heart-even if it didn’t work out.

I get pedicures with another who is now a great friend and still makes me laugh harder than most people I know. (Yup, pedis)

I forgive.

I let go.

Keep smiling.

Hoping;

Believing.

Looking forward, and

Loving.

Knowing

That as much as life has given me reasons to tuck it away (because let’s face it sometimes love just SUCKS right?) my heart will always remain on my sleeve, and that in keeping it there, it is a courageous way of loving myself, too.

Maggie xo